The Obsessed

I have never been stalked before but what do you do about someone who continues to contact you long after you have said goodbye to them more than once? It is guilt-inducing but at the same time very frightening. Akin to attempting to get a message across to a brick wall.

Obsessions smack of not having self-control and being terribly insecure. Why should one person be your only hope at having your desires fulfilled. There are so many more opportunities to find joy and satisfaction.

Its pitiful watching someone deteriorate in this way. Unable to simply let go. You want so desperately to tell them to sod off but you pity them knowing that at the centre of all that insane behaviour is someone desperate for validation.

Wisdom tells me that for the sake of not fanning flames, all communication must be shut off. I will only be rewarding this individual by contacting them.

Sex Appeal: Not Woman Enough

In this patriarchal world, it seems that any woman who hones and focuses on anything more than having sex appeal is dismissed as immature, boring, less female and unattractive. The very basis of this form of female subjugation demands the display of skin for the purpose of enticing a male gaze.

This kind of attitude is not hard to miss and I see poor teenage girls falling prey to this shoddy ideology, dressing in ways that do not fit their age and spending more time being attractive for boys than channeling energy into excelling at sports and academics, thinking about what potential career paths are fitting for their particular personality types.

The world we inhabit encourages girls to grow believing that their worth is measured by their appearance and, of course, ideological state apparatus' such as the media, family, and even religion has women thinking that they should work over-time at improving their looks. Once for wearing loose jeans, I had someone inform me that I was "selling myself short". Imagine that. Really? Not reaching my full potential is not achieving my goals. The last time I checked. My goals did not include wearing life-sapping skinny jeans that cause itching, sweat and blocked follicles that may result in rash for the sake of looking good.

These pressures put on women is one reason I was compelled to read 'The Beauty Myth' by Naomi Wolf last year which, though exaggerated and focused more on the plight of white, middle-class women in North America, struck a major chord in my mind.

The lack of coverage of female sports is, without surprise, also a consequence of this line of thinking. Without a sexist gender binary in place, women's sports would be taken just as seriously as males. This article at Gender Across Borders explains the link between this phenomenon and sexism quite well.

Tim Wise Delivers

Eloquently done and full of wisdom. Tim Wise's lecture on "white privilege" gives you insight into the workings of race construction, white privilege and systems of racial domination in the U.S. not dissimilar to other society's upon which apartheid has wreaked mighty havoc.