Social Butterfly Phase

Has sort of begun in my life. I've changed my mind about ways in which I approached matters in life. It's funny how a single event or two can just twist your mindset on its head and force you to rethink. Take a chance in life. Break away from old inhibitors. For once, I did so. I found the courage somehow. Galvanised.

And it was most certainly worth it.

Mo'Nique Wins...yes, yes, yes

She has taken the gong for best supporting actress at the Golden Globes this year. I am just routing for her to do a straight clean sweep this award reason. It will be wonderful to watch. Boy. If she takes the Oscar. I'll just be over the moon for her. More power.

The Dark and the Light

This weekend I fell victim to a violent familial assault based on a very common error in judgement that people make when dealing with black people of varying shades. It is basic knowledge that within the black race, there are alternating degrees of brown intensity. No big deal you may think. But black people who don't observe patterns of behaviour that are informed by social heirarchies easily succumb to these negative habits. The darkest of us are considered the worst off. The lighter ones in an apparently better position. I'm not just talking about beauty. That's old ass. There's more. It's character interpretation I'm talking about here.

Religious iconography and ideas linked with the darker shades on the spectrum are especially guilty of perpetuating notions that sit in people's subconscious minds. Informing the ways in which they choose to perceive others.

Taking the example of my family for instance. Deeply religious and mad about Jesus. There seems to exist a spirit of white worship and black hatred latent in discussions I observe. I can't help but think that the way in which the Bible narrates in terms of dark and light, beast and angel (mostly so in Revelations) has some impact on the way in which devoutly religious people view race. I see this in my family's insistence on the notion that I am apparently possessed by an evil spirit whenever I express my displeasure of an issue. Hmmm...I can't help but think that the fact that my skin is deeply dark gives them more reason to associate me with mystical, imaginary ideas such as demons. It is quite an insistence that over time I began to parody it in the former title of my blog. That my dark skin often seems to impress on people even those in my family that there is something diabolical about my character and motives. The more ignorant one is of the true nature of dark black people on an individualistic level, the easier it is for them to depend upon these generalizations. I say, Educate thyself. Black people are not exempt from this either. Even I have fallen prey to these patterns of thinking.

A Haitian Tragedy

Natural disasters are always sad to see happen. But when nature wreaks havoc on a nation so impoverished as Haiti, it's even worse. All I can say is that my heart goes out to all those people that have lost their livelihoods. Can't even begin to imagine being in that situation. But it makes me so much more grateful for what I have. Really nothing to complain about when you witness this kind of tragedy.

Facebook: the future of open human database listings

"Time keeps on slipping, slipping into the future" sings Seal in his beautiful mid-tempo ballad 'Fly Like An Eagle'. So it does. Eleven days ago we entered a new decade. Now new announcements are being made with respect to the most well-known and popular of all SNS's - facebook:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/craig-kanalley/facebook-privacy-concerns_b_418031.html

No more privacy. That's it. We are steadily reaching what many a futuristic novel have predicted. Alongside the surrepticious surveillance of spy satellites, a social networking site that once took so much pride in maintaining a code of privacy for its users and attracted more as a result of this policy is bulldozing our carefully constructed virtual walls and leaving us bare, naked and exposed for all who have the interest to gape into the intricate workings of our personal lives. Yey! Even more reason to get all deceptive and fake like many a user on myspace. People sought facebook for the kind of transparency that would only be safe to reveal among those one knows from real world i.e vis-à-vis interactions. Now that all is open to whomever, it's right back to the type of guarded artificiality which emerges from the motivations caused by self-preservation. There really aren't that many absolutely nonchalant people out there. That will tolerate drunken pics on their profiles knowing that Seung Chi in Bangkok will have a giggle at pics of Gina and Casey from California taking part in some drunken exhibitionist snogging at a frat party. Or Themba in Durban smoking a blunt with his boys and his boss seeing this and then second guessing his presence at the company. Or worse, that creep from down the road who you catch staring at you on the subway manages to find your info on facebook and takes his stalking to another level. Dangers that we are all smart enough to identify unless you happen to be a money hungry CEO looking to increase revenue by opening up the site to companies hoping to get a piece of the facebook marketing pie. It's all about the money honey. But why let your integrity and good knowledge be subdued by greed? Lame question huh. One may never know until they get into the kind of wealth that this kid has accumulated. Power corrupts absolutely indeed.

Was Not Born For Servitude

This is why I am so hooked on and thankful for the SWPD blog . The posts are insightful, loaded with truth and universal. The same kind of racism exists almost everywhere. The two most recent posts which address the issue of the stereotype of the Strong and/or Angry Black Woman have brought me so much peace knowing that there are Black women out there who are experience what I do and have just about had enough of being treated in ways that suggest that we are not human like whites are. All I could really say after reading the following comments was "Finally, someone has said it!" And in such a concise, eloquent and dignified way.

For instance, when examining why no one chose to speak up against some of the ironically demonstrative comments toward Black women, Witchsistah notes:

This constant non-defending of BW comes directly from the stereotype of BW not being "real" women as in not being seen as delicate, feminine, worthy of care, affection and protection. We are seen as "mules uh duh worl'" and as rhino-hided, she-beasts utterly incapable of delicate, complex feelings or thoughts. Basically no one defends us because we can "take it." It also leads to the idea that BW cannot ever be harmed (from this comes the view that BW are un-rapeable).

So I'm just going to leave off with words by RVCBard, and then a few more by Witchsistah:

When Black women talk about their experiences as Black women here at SWPD, people (particularly White people, but at times other WoC as well), tend to respond with knee-jerk contradictions (typically betraying a lack of true engagement with the content) or remain silent.

For me, personally, it would be nice to see more comments make a more proactive attempt to engage with Black women in a more constructive way.

How about treating Black women as if we are, first of all, human? Yeah, it goes without saying, but from how we're treated, I'm not always sure people truly assume that from jump street. How about treating Black women like women and not disobedient children? Again, it goes without saying, but from what I've seen, I'm not sure if a lot of you really grasp that. How about treating Black women as though our lives are important to us? Once more, it goes without saying, but the things I've seen make me question whether you genuinely understand that.

IMO, there will be less explosive fireworks and fewer ruffled feathers if more people started showing us that they are operating from these very basic foundational concepts.

In the long run, we find black girls growing up knowing that the face they must present to the world is one of strength and resilience simply because in having nobody care, show remorse of compassion for their struggle they learn that feelings which display vulnerability are to be hidden. Because if you show them...well, nobody will give a shit. You are supposed to be strong. You are supposed to take anything. You are basically supposed to not operate as a human being with emotion does.

Then there is that Angry Black Woman stereotype which annoys me because while anger is a veritably human emotion (something we all experience at some point or another), when a Black woman shows this emotion, this fact is used as justification for the preconceived idea of the Angry Black Woman. You are immediately identified not as a person experiencing anger at that particular moment but are viewed as an angry person in general. Which again, nullifies the fact that you are simply human as everyone else is. If a white person were to express anger, they would not be labelled an angry person but one would only say that they are just angry at that certain moment. So, many Black women find themselves going out of their way to avoid expressing negative emotions due to the fact that any display of these will be used against them (to justify their instrinsic savagery) or will be given as a substantiation for any subsequent abuse the Black woman will face as a result i.e. "She deserved to be hit, she was talking out of her mouth."

Often any display of assertiveness is met with a comment about how much of an "attitude" you have. By not playing out your expected role of "servant", you are in violation and must be reminded of your place. The fact that you are not being submissive makes you a deviant i.e. a woman with a so-called "attitude". Again, denial of humanity. A Black women is not allowed to lay down boundaries and assert herself as whites have the privilege of doing without anyone questioning their choices.
Since many men come with the expectation that Black women are hypersexual (courtesy of rap videos), without saying Black women are expected to act lasciviously and without restraint. Failure to do this again usually ends in some form of insult. The sting of rejection from a Black woman is just too much. We are the ones who are supposed to be down with absolutely anything - the apparent "dregs of humanity". A rejection from one of us surely must be a diss.

Before reading these blog extracts today, the thought came to mind. The behaviours I have observed have often times surprised me. When I thought, "Is this person for real?" Why feel it okay to call me a "bitch" when you have no idea who I am? Or think that I would engage in intimate relations with you when I have no idea who the hell you are? It's failure to recognise the fact that people are individuals and not archetypes. In dismissing individulaity one will assume that they know a complete stranger quite well enough already and will treat them according to those very preconceived ideas borne out of ignorance.

I have heard men speak up about the same psychological process which takes place in their own growing years. When a boy is conditioned into false concepts of manhood, he is taught that it is unlike a man to show vulnerable emotions and act sensitively. This is "sissy" behaviour and mor derogatorily seen as something a "gayboy" would do. I don't think that this is good either. I have said before that I disagree heavily with socially-defined ideas on manhood. That Black women are made to undergo the same process of development can be seen as a masculinization of Black women.

Being a Black woman myself, I know exactly how this proces works. All too well. In encounters I have where people feel they can dump their hatred and anger on me without any kind of remorse for their actions, I identify an inablity on those individual's parts to see me as a person that could potentially take some injury from that level of abuse. I see it in those individuals who acted out verbally or physically because I chose, as I have a right to, to assert my own wishes. They expected obedience from me (again disregarding my humanity) and because I showed no interest in being their puppet, I deserved to be aimed at as a target for scorn or mistreatment. These are men I am talking about mind you. Childish - throwing toys when their wishes are not met. "From the nipple to the bottle never satisfied!"

Essentially, these people also believed in the notion of female servitude. So strongly in fact that it was a cause for concern when a woman did not obey them. CHAUVINISM. So again. When it comes to treatment of Black women - racism and sexism are inextricably linked. Everything I speak of here is my own explanation for what I have experienced. There may be alternative explanations but from the commonality of this kind of treatment as seen at SWPD, it certainly is no co-incidence to me.

According to this article about the song "She'a A B****" by Missy Elliot, the song aimed to somewhat parody the critics who labelled here with the derogatory term as well as empower herself by making light of the word and using it rather as a way of portraying her strong-will. But while she is portraying herself in this light, we must remember that she has other aspects of her that would express a vulnerability and humanity we all have. Missy has spoken about her history of severe emotional and sexual abuse. This affected her as it would anyone else. But she has overcome it and gone on to become arguably the best female rapper in history. An icon in her own right. Yeah, you've got to love her.

Dear Mr President, Why Are We Regressing into the Dark Ages?

This week, the president of South Africa - Jacob Zuma - married his fifth wife Nompumelelo Ntuli in a traditional Zulu ceremony at his Nkandla homestead. Fifth, yes, fifth. Polygamy happens to be a legal sport in this nation I find myself residing in. It is absolutely fine, under our country's constitution, for a man to wed more than one woman and have each of these marriages lawfully recognised and registered under the Home Affairs database.

What protects these ludicrous ideas? Tradition. Long-standing tradition than modern pan-Africanists believe European imperialist powers have tried to remove in their attempt to control trade during colonial days. It's quite clear this side of the argument is merely a guise under which misogynistic ideals that substantiate this commodification of women are concealed. With this anti-colonialist stance, traditionalist South African men are hoping to protect their supposed male privilege which makes them feel they have the right to own women and engage in intimate relations with more than one woman at a time without the weight of being accused of adultery. Even more so, those in support of polygamy believe it is somewhat better for men to be given the right under law to have more than one wife than to revel in illicit affairs on the down low with their mistresses.

Progress is gender equality. Gender equality is the future as far as I am concerned. These kind of practices simply do not belong in the fabric modern society. They are primitive and demeaning. When the president of a country does nothing more than collect women in the manner one would collect prized posessions, how can problems such as wage gaps and violence against women be properly addressed. At the root of the patholgies that cause men to appropriate and disrespect female bodies is the notion that women are somehow inferior and should take their role as weak and powerless submissives in society. Which limits them from being taken seriously (as men are) in the workplace and in parliament. And also encourages men to beat their imperiously beat their wives up. Seek extra-maritial affairs without guilt or concern for the psychological implications this will have on the various members of the household. And simply treat women not as fellow human beings but rather as members of some sort of subhuman race of people that happen to exist alongside them and on who, ironically enough, they are intrinsically and desperately dependant for just about...everything in their lives including their very own existence on this mad planet. How funny.

This practice should not be legal. For a country that is struggling to reduce its HIV/AIDS infection rate, it is not only terribly embarrassing for the president to set the standard for female oppression and objectification for men in the country to happily follow, but also exacerbates the various problems underlying the spread of this disease. These problems, of course, have plenty to do with gender relations. Which I believe are deeply troubled and in need of fixing.

How About a Little Contented Singlehood

Here's a topic I rarely approach on this blog. My love-life or lack of one, I should say. Sivving through the comment section on Black Snob's blog in response to the problem Black women in the US seem to face regarding marriage, I found this quote.

Until recently,(I'm ashamed to admit) I was beginning to think that I wasn't attractive enough to get a man. I was beginning to think that I was invisible to single men within my age group and with whom I share an educational background. I couldn't figure out what wrong with me.
Now I see things in a different light. First, if the women in this video don't have mates then something else must be afoot because they are all beautiful and accomplished. Second, I realize that maybe, deep down, I cherish my independence and freedom too much, to want to share with anyone. I like who I am with all my quirks and don't want to change. Why should I? Add to that, relationship people ( you the type who always speak in terms of "we") really annoy me. And married women who feel that the goal in life was to get a man marry them, just are not my type of people.

So, I am not alone in thinking this. For a while, it seemed that I was the only one within my circles who regards relationships as not-quite-necessary-for-my-survival. I understand that they are important. Yes, a bit of companionship is good for the psyche afterall. But is it so absolutely necessary that a person must take on a puzzled expression and then quiz you on the fact that you are not presently in a relationship. It seems as if there is some universal message we have all come to accept which says that there is something faulty about being single and that one's state of singlehood must be uncomfortable. In response to my singlehood, I have heard comments along the lines of "Why not?" or "How can that be?" And the most baffling one of all came from a married old man who claimed that he would have to "fix that"....eeeeew!!!!! Lol! And wondered what problem I would have with sharing a place with a boyfriend. You know what? They do not call this living in sin for no reason!! Again, this is something I just do not get. It's bad enough you would have to live with that person after getting married but to do so before...hey, maybe if you really do love someone you'd put up with the annoying habits.

No wonder so many people, women especially, overload themselves with panick at the thought of not being able to find the "perfect" mate before their biological clockc tick out.

I would like to say that I am in no mood for panick. Yes, I have ages to go before any such even occurs with regards to the plumbing downstairs. Even now, whilst most it appears are hopping between relationships - trying to look for the "right" one, they explain. I, for some reason, just could not be bothered at all. Besides the fact that a relationship may be a cause for unecessary stress (dealing with personality differences, psychological issues...what the hell do I know??), it just doesn't strike me as something that important. I might change my mind in future but right now, educating my black ass seems to take number one priority. And I know how older people like to advise us about how we should enjoy our youth while it lasts and we'll never look this good again. But surely there is more to life than mindless hedonism (sex, drugs and rock 'n roll). When that's all you consider as what comprises a "good time", then of course someone like me who finds alternatives will strike you as a bore, too serious or a person wasting away their youth on books and philosophy. But we are all essentially individuals at the end of the day - with our own little quirks. Often, depending on the person one finds themselves in a relationship with, these idiosyncracies are stamped out for the sake of "making a relationship work" and one cannot truly be themselves. Especially at my fragile age of 21 which is only the beginning of my journey through self-discovery, I cannot possibly define what I really want out a relationship. So, instead my focus lies in building a career because if I end up all on my lonesome in the long run, I need to have a way to put bread on my table and feed my invitro-babies. This will be a last resort however, single motherhood is a tough job. Last resort but still an option because you never know.

I want to live being able to fully normalise the concept of singlehood. It is fine. It is good even. How else does one find the time to engage in introspective thought - learning to understand their mind a little better. Marriage should not be what women look for to be "whole". One should find that "wholeness" and confidence in solitude first before joining together with another human in a serious relationship that could possibly last a lifetime. It's not a fairytale, it does happen. In fact, if you two are wise, resilient and compatible enough, it should happen.

As for inter-racial. I'm all for it baby. All the colours of the rainbow (the ethnic one that is).

UChicago Admissions Gets Steamy

One thing I did notice about this college some two and a bit years ago was the level of unconvention it strives to with regards to its admissions. There was nothing too austere or stern about it's approach the college application process and almost every instructional sentence on the web page sought to reduce any kind of pedantism. So I am not really all that surprised at the recent controversy stirring over an Early Decision 2010-11 applicant's essay which dove very superficially I might add into the world of erotic literature. By creating an analogy between human mating habits and the student's application process to the College, the student explained how UChi-Town will "satisfy" his "desire" for a specific kind of learning. You mean, they still got that essay topic running (yawn!). At least the boy spiced it up a little. Even if it did make for some cringe-worthy erotica. Who am I kidding. Any erotica is good erotica. Right?

"Dear University of Chicago, It fills me up with that gooey sap you feel late at night when I think about things that are really special to me about you,” the essay began. “Tell me, was I just one in a line of many? Was I just another supple ‘applicant’ to you, looking for a place to live, looking for someone to teach me the ways of the world?

Wrong. It's not even thaaaat raw you know what I mean. There is a hint at body fluids but nothing too explicit but since it is University we are dealing with here and the last thing parents need to think about is the sex that their "innocuos", "well-raised" young ones are going to be partaking in in any case, such talk is preposterous and absolutely worthy of complaint.

Courtesy of this article at Gawker which supplied me with a good dose of laughs this evening. Props. Kudos.

That said, the best are the parents who get their fangs out over it, far more so than the kids. One—"MumMum"—notes:

I agree with the person who said cloying and almost painful to read. Unless one really likes that mop commercial.

Jesus, parents are all over this College Confidential nonsense. That woman's logged 175 posts! Another user's name is VicariousParent. She claws:

I 'got' the essay (in the OP) but personally I thought it was 'meh'. It got a bit tiresome after the first few sentences.

Even the NY Times paid this incident some attention, imagine making the news and all you did was write an application essay. Lucky stiff I tell you (no pun...I promise).

Oh, the sauciness of it. Keep it cumming Dean Nondorf (no pun...ehehe). Would T.O'Neill (toenail?)  have had the audacity to post such an excerpt for public display and hold it up as the  modus operandis for the relaxed and open tone expected of application essays? There's no telling. But thanks for the entertainment people. Much appreciate it.

To Shy Away from Misandry...

Takes a lot of self-control when people such as this guy exist in the world. But boy oh boy is it funny...(in a very twisted kind of way).

Then there are a pile of other douches that one must live with. But I don't need to revisit that. It is afterall a NEW YEAR. 2010 has arrived. Much to be done. Much to be achieved.

A New Archetype: Nigerian Terrorist

In no way are terrorist activities justifiable. They are heinous, futile acts motivated by abstract concepts. But the fact that the 23 year old man who attempted to detonate some kind of bomb on a flight to Detroit is Nigerian does nothing to quell the international fears the world seems to retain in their minds when it comes to this nation. People find further reason to entrench negative ideas about Nigerians through incidents such as these. No matter how isolated and rare, there is now reason, proper reason at that to condemn them negatively.

That's a problem. In general, people are barely capable of individualising behaviours of certain types of people. They'll take what one person from that group has done and use it as a representation of the group as a whole. And it's only certain types of people. Usually the groups of which most are ignorant about.

Feministing explained this fact better than I have here. Props. Kudos.

 
I am certainly not trained or practiced in the business of psychology but I think that some counselling would have prevented Abdul Farouk Abdulmutallab's actions. It sounds to me that he was just a young man struggling to find an identity and make peace with himself. We all go through it at some point. Who am I? Where do I go from here? etc etc General confusion that occurs when self-doubt and insecurity creep in. It helps to talk to someone about the internal crisis but he seemed to have alienated himself so much that he was far beyond any form of counsel. Being so closed up and faraway, who can help?

 "I have no one to speak too [sic],
 No one to consult, no one to support me and I feel depressed and lonely. I do not know what to do. And then I think this loneliness leads me to other problems."

With all that privilege and wealth, he still could not find some morsel of serenity within himself. Money sure can't buy you everything. Here's more proof of that. Why is it that despite his father's expressed suspicion's of the young man, why did he not take any serious measures to prevent his son from engaging in an act that would destroy his future. Why instead choose to contact authorities, report your own blood and leave him to his own vices. As if setting up a mouse-trap and standing close by to observe the subsequent and expected result. I smell a rat. This just doesn't sound like wholesome and loving parental behaviour to me. Sounds more along the lines of..."I have a problem child, he embarrasses me. I must find a way to get him out of sight and out of mind." Of course, this is just a speculation but inquiry, as we all know, is important. Never taking anything at face value. "People are not what they seem" in many cases.

2009: Final Year of the Decade

Now we come to 2009. Amazing how quickly time flies. I finally earned my key to "life" as my brother informed me. Well, that's something scary right there. I've crossed over the threshold between childhood and adulthood just as the turn of the decade approaches. This is the beginning of the rest of my life and I know it's going to be a fantastic ride. I look forward!

10. Rye Rye feat. MIA - Bang
9. Lady Gaga - Poker Face
8. 50 Cent - Baby By Me
7. Adam Lambert - Mad World
6. K'Naan - T.I.A.
5. The Gossip - Heavy Cross
4. Santigold - L.E.S. Artistes
3. Blame It feat. T-Pain - Jamie Foxx
2. Many Moons - Janelle Monae
1. SANTIGOLD - STARSTRUCK

Why still no video Santigold? This song is dope to the nth power! Oh well.

2008: Pulled in Two Directions

So I enrolled at a local college after trying to think things through for a while. Constant access to a large library database is a dangerous thing to someone such as moi. Wits was a blast but I don't think I want to go back!

10. Linkin Park - Leave Out All the Rest
9. Amy Winehouse - Rehab
8. Kanye West - Love Lockdown
7. Pink - So What
6. Chris Brown - With You
5. Violet Hill - Coldplay
4. Lupe Fiasco - Dumb It Down
3. Lil' Wayne - Lollipop
2. Estelle - American Boy
1. MIA - Paper Planes

2007: What Does Life Mean?

Finishing high school left me in a state of doldrums. Questioning what it is that I want to make out of my life. Plenty of introspection was required. Although I managed to develop some morsel of good self-perception, I'm still slightly unsure. I have paths pointing in all sorts of directions. It's confusing. Guess if I rely on instinct, I'll be able to make it through and choose a path that brings me joy, serenity and some contentment. Not too much of it however.

10. MIMS - This is Why I'm Hot
9. Timbaland feat. Keri Hilson - The Way I Are
8. 50 Cent feat. Justin - Ayo Technology
7. John Legend - PDA
6. Swizz Beatz - Money in the Bank
5. Nickelback - If Everyone Cared
4. Rihanna - Umbrella
3. Lupe Fiasco - Kick Push
2. Kanye West - Stronger
1. Boyz - MIA

2006: Final Year of High School

During breaks between studying when I relieved my behind from the numbness of sitting down. Nerdy me would bump up the volume and get jamming. Here were some of the songs that got me up again, calmed me down and made me reminisce like I'm doing now.

10. MJB - Be Without You
9. P. Diddy feat. Nicole - Come 2 Me
8. Cassie - Long Way to Go
7. Rafael Saadiq - I Want You Back
6. Sean Paul - Temperature
5. Kelis - Bossy
4. Floetry - My Apology
3. Brand New Heavies - Don't Know Why
2. T.I. - Why You Wanna?
1. Busta Rhymes feat. MJB, Rah Diggah, Missy, Papoose, DMX etc - Touch It (Remix)...CLASSIC!

2005: The One Thing That Danced Me Into a Trance

I started taking a firm interest in Souther Rap so T.I. was on heavy rotation on my playlists. Don't care much for him these days. Commercialized. It happens to the best of them.

10. Girl - Destiny's Child
9. NERD - Maybe
8. Snoop feat. Pharrell - Drop It LIke It's Hot
7. Black Eyed Peas - Don't Phunk With My Heart
6. Missy Elliot - Lose Control
5. Chingy - One Call Away
4. Zap Mama - Bandy Bandy
3. Beenie Man - King of Dancehall
2. T.I. - ASAP
1. Amerie - One Thing

2004: Year of Dancehall

In came beloved family from Leeds with a pile of dancehall CD's for my mind. I learnt how all the best moves from Beenie Man and Sean da Paul videos. I was hooked on the Kingston energy. What can I say? It was a great year for dance tracks.

10. Akon - Belly Dancer
9. Chingy - Right Thurr
8. JKwon - Tipsy
7. Black Eyed Peas - Hey Mama
6. Kanye West - Jesus Walks
5. Brandy Afrodisiac
4. Beenie Man - Dude
3. Yeah! - Usher
2. Ciara - Goodies
1. Kelis - Milkshake

2003: Go, Go, Go, Shorty It's Your Birthday

Back to South Africa this year. First year at Crawford and at the mention of that all I seem to hear is 50 Cent rapping the hook to In Da Club. This song was a smash. Anyone in the world would tell you that. But there was someone else who had my young adolescent lustful gaze - Pharrell. Boy oh boy did I love me some of him. The things we think as teenagers!

10. Coldplay - Clocks
9. Hey Ya! - Outkast
8. Nas -Made You Look
7. Eminem - Lose Yourself
6. 50 Cent - In Da Club
5. Sean Paul - Get Busy
4. Jay Z - Excuse Me Miss - La La La (Remix)
3. Joe Budden - Pump it Up
2. Busta Rhymes feat. Pharrell - Light Your Ass On Fire
1. Pharrell feat. Jay Z - Frontin'

2002: Leeds

Spent the year in Leeds, England so almost every song released during that year takes me back to that. I never mind a good chill.

10. Christina Milian - AM 2 PM
9. Misteek - B With Me (Remix)
8. Pink - Get the Party Started
7. Ms Dynamite - DY-NA-MI-TEE
6. Shakira - Whenever, Wherever
5. Usher - U Don't Have 2 Call
4. Nickelback - How You Remind Me
3. More Fire Crew - Oi
2. Clipse - Grindin'
1. Sean Paul - Gimme the Light

2001: I Became I Teenager

I turned 13, what a milestone. Some of the songs that peak up in my memory for the year I finished primary school and became an adolescent. Angst ahead of me!

10. Blue Cantrell - Hit Em Up Style
9. Mandoza - Nkalakhata
8. Kelis - Young, Fresh 'N New (hey, hey, hey...get rich to dis!)
7. Mystikal - Shake Your Ass (yoou know)
6. Nelly - E.I. (underlay, underlay mami...)
5. Destiny's Child - Bootylicious
4. Busta Rhymes feat. Kelis - What It Is Right Now
3. Tank - Maybe I Deserve (aaaaaw!!)
2. Missy Elliot - Get Ur Freak On
1. Aaliyah - Resolution

2000: Kelis Screamed Her Way Into My World

Since the decade will be coming to a close very soon. In less than two weeks - can you believe how time flies? I've decided to take a trip down memory lane and recall the good times.

I was in 6th grade in 2000. Whenever I could, I would watch a free-broadcast of Channel O on SABC 1. Good 'ole days. I was really into R'n'B back then, The lyrics meant nothing to me of course. What does an eleven year old know about love and relationships but the beats got me vibing. And dance I did.

10. Mya - Case of the Ex
9. Nas feat. Ginuwine - You Owe Me
8. DMX - Ruff Ryders Anthem
7. Jay Z feat. Pharrell - I Just Wanna Luv Ya
6. Destiny's Child - Say My Name
5. Jill Scott - Gettin' in the Way
4. Redman and Methodman - Da Rockweilder
3. Missy Eliot - She's a B****
2. Kelis - Caught Out There
1. 702 - Where My Girls At?

Penile Complicity

Tiger Woods is not someone I know personally. But there's something about him that's always made me nonchalant toward him. Yes, yes good for him for making history with his green blazer PGA victories and all of that. Who am I to judge but the guy always came across as somewhat arrogant. And it's shown. Sex, lies and no videotape...yet. Why this is such a massive story is beyond me. But it's been interesting to note the amount of support he's been receiving from other MEN namely sportsmen. It's kind of sickening and smacks of what we all know as male privilege. Here we have a high profile, very wealthy male athlete who has cheated on his wife with several women. You have people like Dennis Rodman, Donald Trump and Charles Barkley sending him messages like "hang in there". It's as if he is some kind of victim in the midst of a media firestorm that has been brought upon him without any of his doing. I don't get it. Instead of pointing out his obvious disrespect and audacity to commit such trifles, they're showing him love. These types of men have normalized infidelity so much in their minds that when they are caught in the act and punished for it (as Gillete has done with Tiger), their self-perception is that of unwarranted persecution instead of worthy justice.

So, in the minds of privileged men, cheating is right. These people feel entitled to use their money to lure women into relationships in order to feed their empty, insatiable shells. When obstacles come in the way of achieving this end, they transform into the hapless victim.

I don't think I need to point out the apparent double standard. If this was a woman, not only would she be immediately labelled negatively. She would also not experience the same kind of support that Tiger's contemporaries are offering him.

Growing Up Girl, Being Black

When I read essays such as this one, I am reminded of how important it is to view the world through an objective and critical lens. Critique is necessary to avoid internalising fallacies and driving myself into a ditch. Objectivity is required to avoid getting angry.


Yet it makes tons of sense when spoken in light of perplexing encounters that leave you wondering whether or not some people are capable of seeing a fellow human being when looking toward you. Archetypes just annoy the hell out of me. Literally. When the machinations of this collectively racist and sexist consciousness reaches my understanding. My fires cool. Guess I just stop taking it to heart.

My Take On Twilight: New Moon

Simply for the sake of finding out what all the mayhem was about, went to see "New Moon" two weeks ago and them again today. Simply to accompany some friends still in the dark about it and to...yes, I wanted to see Taylor Lautner's buff and beautiful physique. No shame. Not at all. I have not read any of the books. After what I've seen so far, I don't think it'll be worth the time.
Plenty of discouraging remarks from Ms Peterson and the league of extraordinary commenters

It's enough to keep me away from the third one. But I'm so adamant to see how Chris Weitz or whoever is directing "Eclipse" transposes Meyer's third book in the series.

"Wait Your Turn, Chris!"

Laughing at some of the tweets I read with reference to Rihanna's new video. Not Russian Roulette which is so flat, the Namib Desert is jealous (drum strikes for the bad joke). It's this song called Wait Your Turn. How baffling this young lady's behaviour is becoming. I have expressed my concern for her. Has she found emotional healing from the abuse. Think about the transition she's made from her "Music of the Sun" sugary to the point of wackness sweetness to this dark, dreary, gloom and doom character that's "Rated R". Pointing guns at the camera and grabbing her crotch. Even Grace Jones didn't instigate this much violence. She was eccentric yes, hypersexual yes but I can't remember her making threats to harm with her body language. I'm mobile so can't post the video. You know what to do YouTube addicts.

Why I Don't Believe in Vengeance

Lately, I've been delving into some literature about the subject of verbal abuse. I've learned so much. Ironically enough, Womanist Musings happened to have a post closely related to this topic:

http://www.womanist-musings.com/2009/12/eminem-plays-with-words-to-disguise.html

In the past I've made the same mistake of attempting to transfer the pain of things said to me and of me, prejudiced, cruel treatment from others. I was young and naive. Instead of putting the insults into context, I often allowed myself to hurt over them. It took a toll in the long run and I eventually started lashing out - impersonating those that caused me pain.

That's what Eminem is doing. I often felt compassion for him especially after hearing "Cleaning Out My Closet" in 2002. I can see the source of his pain but he, as a 35 year old man, must be mature and realise that the past no longer has an influence unless one chooses to give it one. But instead of using his adversity as a way of knowing others' struggles and becoming empathetic and kind, he does the opposite by turning into the father that left him, the mother that neglected him and all those that hurt him very deeply.

It's difficult especially if one's wounds are deep to march forward and heal. I've learned that for the sake of one's wellbeing, if anything else, love and forgiveness are the key.

Full Blown and It Could Have Been Avoided

After watching a documentary entitled "The Age of AIDS", I'm left quite depressed but also flabbergasted at the failure of South African goverment since 1994 to tackle the issue of the epidemic.
Nelson Mandela did very little to address it during his presidency owed to the fact that little was still known of the virus at the time. It was still much of a myth that many believed only affected those overseas. Namely white male homosexuals in the USA. Not the migrant mine workers, prostitutes in "mine brothels" and wives and girlfriends of these men. It is believed that this is where the virus boomed.
So while goverment paid more attention to uniting the nation after the end of the apartheid era, this was mainly ignored. With the new administration still under ANC rule, Thabo Mbeki only sought to worsten an already deepening problem by denying that HIV causes AIDS and by stating that the "toxic" aspect of anti retro viral drugs should limit them from being given to patients. The result of this was a boom in mother to child infections. Imagine. All the kids born in that period whose mothers were unfortunate enough to have contracted HIV could have been spared the chance of living with the virus themselves. But the president chose to ignore the crisis at hand. Sad.
Well now for the results...South Africa has the highest infection rate in the world. And the president we have now seems to think that all you have to do to make the virus go away is take a shower! And that it is absolutely fine to have more than one marriage partner (ONLY if you're a MAN) I've heard him sing "Mshini Wami" (translation: bring my machine gun) more times than I've heard him talk about the importance of safe sex. On top of that, there is a violence and crime epidemic. I (very sarcastically) wonder why??

Well it's plain to see now isn't it. The tragedy of this nation lies for the most part in the inability of a post-apartheid government. Only concerned with power.

No "Proper" Actor in South Africa?

Black Snob I'm going to bite you: O RLY?? Luvvie darling I'm also going to bite you: iRefuse to accept that the reason big budget motion pictures don't use African-born actors is because there aren't any. No, there are plenty. But the fact that they're a bunch of nobody's reduces their suitability for playing lead protagonists for such high-scale movie projects.

This was just one of the illogical comments published at the imdb.com on the message board for the movie Invictus. Where there were complaints about Morgan Freeman's lousy accent. Which from what I've seen in the trailer really is off to say the least. And yes, we all know he is the crème de la crème of the veteran Hollywood fold but even Denzel (no surname needed, that's how larger than life he is) faltered with his role as Steve Biko in Cry Freedom. With that high-pitched fantastical "imitation" of a South African accent. What was meant to be a stern biopic of an extremely important figure in the South African freedom struggle turned into somewhat of a comedic interpretation of this man's life (something I'd imagine Dave Chapelle performing in one of his 15 minute skits). It leaves many thinking, "Why not just use African actors?"

Alot of it probably has to do with African American actors being recognisable and therefore better able to draw the public's attention. That's an obvious one. But why can't they just follow Don Cheadle and Forrest Whitaker's examples and take the time to really study the accents and dialects, master them and carry them out properly in their portrayals. It's more than just vying for an Oscar, just the mere fact of acknowledging the intricacy and uniqueness of each manner of speech on the continent that differ from location to location will be a huge leap for Hollywood. If using unknowns is too risky at least whip those American tongues into shape with proper language training from the locals themselves. Don't forget to pay them properly for their tutoring services.

As for Jennifer Hudson playing Winnie Mandela in director, Darrel Roodt's upcoming project. I'm not too sure what to expect but I believe in her acting abilities. Let's be honest, the movie's earnings may not be that great if they chose to cast a locally-known South African actress in place of J.Hudson. She did win an Oscar and people always stand up and listen when Oscar winners happen to appear.

"We Make Sure The Black Don't Make You Look Hard"

In a L'oréal commercial for their new range of dark toned hair colour, I well, heard something that made me raise a brow. Several times in fact. In between Penelope Cruz's constant reiteration of the word "Glossy", yes I feel the script could have been better on her part but this is L'oréal and they do like exoticizing WOC when they feel compelled to use them, at the same time avoiding too much blackness in their advertising. Remember what they did to Beyonce anyone?
Now in this one, they imply that dark hair somehow takes away from a woman's facial softness. "L'oréal Dark Glossy takes care not to harden the features." Huh? I didn't know that having dark hair makes you look "hard". Now imagine having dark skin to top it. I think I can really understand now this dark and bright skin dichotomy links up with assumptions on how a person supposedly is.

Big Brother Africa: Yardstick for Africa's Progression Away from Tradition

As Big Brother draws to a long-awaited close tonight, I seek to take a moment of reflection. Of the incorrect grammar and spelling on the 24/7 channel's strap (text message board) and the interactive part of the website, I am hardly surprised. Just take a sample of YouTube comments, most of which it takes some time to decipher into standard English and you will understand. It was interesting to see comments made about each individual housemate. The public's opinions about specific behaviours and events. How most of these were similar throughout the continent and what they say of Africa's general approach to certain aspects. I shall discuss gender and class here since all housemates except one were Black.

It was clear from the beginning that all the women were, as is always done, judged according to looks. The darkskinned, skinny haute couture model types were taken out first after week 1 when the show was still streamlined according to gender. They were not labelled as one of the "hot girls" in the house and were eliminated despite Maggie's spunky personality. Well. The game continued with viewers using the same standard of comparison for the remaining women. Fast forward to the latter weeks where fewer housemates are present in the house. Scrutiny is placed on the unladylike behaviour of Mzamo from Malawi and Nkenna from Nigeria. The former is chronic drinker, chain smoker, punk-inspired and unabashed about her libidinous boy-chasing ways. While I would say "Mo power to you" in response. The majority of Africa criticised her for not representing a "true African woman". Especiall after her window punching stint which took place after Itai from Zim found it necessary to exclaim that Mzamo does not take pride in her appearance or act like a woman should. This is a clear representation of what I've come to know of traditional African beliefs. They are centred in chauvinism. Because Mzamo displayed behaviour unbecoming of a "woman", she was insulted constantly. Well what then is an African woman? A docile, submissive little dove that cooks, cleans, does not seek to have a career of her own outside the demands of housewivery, never speaks above a whisper and takes abuse from men withouts question.

So it's the virgin-whore dichotomy defining standards of female behaviour. Not suprising. But the amount of contempt shown for Nkenna introduces another form of disdain. For those that occupy of lower status of class in society. For the entire duration of the show, she was referred to as the "village girl". So that left only one female housemate to appreciate, Emma. The closest thing, the public had for an ideal African woman. Pretty (in their opinion), always taking care to look good, "sweet" and involved in a nonsexual relationship with one guy. See how predictable. We dislike the women who don't care and just do themselves. We choose to like the one who takes pride in her looks, is vain and perhaps cares too much what others think to the point of fakeness - which she did display later on. It's a common practice in the assessment of women. Be vain or get out.

Ayeye: Bafana's In Trouble

It's not like they were never in trouble to begin with. Just the way they are - WEAK - is enough to tell you how vulnerable they are. So is the fact that since the Fifa group standings draw for 2010's cup tournament, South Africa has been matched up against giants. Bigg, uggly giants like Mehico who will, will thrash your unpracticing-properly-despite having-a-Brazillian coach behinds. First match by the way. On top of that, group a comprises the French and a powerful south american force known as Uruguay. Ha! Serving you correct host nation. Beat that...in your wildest reveries!

Charlize Theron, your red evening get up with the tiny black belt was underwhelming. David Beckham, you sexy, sexy...just take me now honey, we don't have time to waste...man standing there with an edgy haircut, grey suit and piercing stare looking like you might want to uh do a little something uh later, nah mean? You can never in wrong in my books. The rest of you, you're fine...you're alright with me. Especially you Mr Living Long Distance Running Legend Haile Sellasie. Keep on inspiring us to be better people. David, you inspire me to do other things. Boy, stop!

I Love Gabby Sidibe!

Last night I was privileged to catch the beautiful Ms Sidibe on David Letterman. She looked lovely and it's true, her personality is bubbly, lively and most importantly genuine. Mind you, the person I was sitting with at the time said something very insulting the moment Gabby showed up on the screen.

"WHAT IS THAT OBESITY ON THE SCREEN!"

I just filtered out that piece of rubbish comment and continued to enjoy my favourite actress at the moment talk about herself. Look, I heart her. She's beautiful to me and I couldn't care less what all you with your minds brainwashed by stupid Hollywood beauty standards have to say about that.

She's dark skinned and plus size. To use these factors to rule out a person's attractiveness is being insular and at the core, quite pathetic. You haven't decided things for yourself, you've been dictated to. Try some intellectal autonomy oh ye faithful groupthinkers.

As for the individual who made the above comment. Dissing is her forte even at inopportune moments. But it still reflects a very loathsome attitude that society adopts with regards to larger people. I've always believed that if one is happy, truly happy and secure with themselves then there is no justification under the sun to villify.

I want to see more of Gabby and women like her occupy major roles on the big screen. I know its wishful thinking. But hey. If Gabby is doing it, surely there is hope. Isn't there?

World AIDS day...oh my!

How easily you forget commemorative days during the holiday season. Thank you all bloggers that made sure to remind those of us forgetful about this essential day.
In my land, this problem is rampant. It doesn't seem to be alleviating either. It's an issue that clearly strikes far deeper than we imagine. Perhaps more should be done to address the aspect of moral values than anything else.

"For Your Entertainment"

Surrounded by controversy. Adam Lambert's long awaited album has been released and it sounds like a gigantic ball of glammed up fun. He's an artiste. A true one. I recognised it from day one.

http://www.lyricsreg.com/news/adam+lambert+for+your+entertainment/

How it Feels Like to Be 21

Alright. I'm kicking it. Just kicking it. 21 feels like liberation. It feels like finally having the license to perpetrate the way I always wanted to. It feels great, man. That's all I can say.

Gaga Disqualification

So, apparently Lady Gaga has been disqualified from the Best New Artist Category owed to the fact of her previous nomination. Oh, the grand bureaucracy. A call for dispute based on the prominence of her excessive bizarreness in video music, gigs, award shows and the like which have drawn so much attention worldwide, The Fame sold like hotcakes and became the most paid-attention-to piece of artistry this year.

But, rules are rules and it seems Ms Gaga will not be elligible.

This one made me laugh at some point. You know what, she's just so entertaining in her raw eccentric form. It's unpretentious madness and I love it.

To Die for Freedom of Speech

You know that a nation is corrupt when those whose job it is to deliver news reports to the public are slaughtered. For the sake of protecting one's own power. In this case. The mayor of Manguinadano in the Phillipines ordered 57 journalists killed. The same mayor who assisted their current president to garner votes. Politics in developing countries is rarely a system that works for the good of the people. But as always, for the good of leadership and those empowered by elitism and privilege. These individuals will stop at nothing to protect this.
Tragic.

We Receive Strange Objects from Outer Space Too

This is interesting.

A meteorite lit up the close to midnight sky for Witbank residents two or so days ago

I have not seen nearly as much coverage as I'd appreciate with respect to this story. Besides, it's a lot more effectual to our intellects to hear about the unusual interactions between stubborne objects from space dying to taste a little bit of our atmosphere than Malema and them doing uuuuh...nothing of any significance. I mean that.

A friend of mine reported to have been a witness to the events. Stating that he saw the sky light up bright white and some object which seemed to appear as a "shooting star too close" settled after speeding through the atmosphere very quickly. This was at around 23h00 on Saturday the 21st November.

Interesting, indeed.

Lambert's Debut at the AMA's

Well now. I must say, the performance was edgy. Covered my open mouth with the palms of my hands for a while after he rubbed that male dancer's face into his crotch. Hmmm. Adam. In fact, I think I heard a mixture of cheers and murmuring protests from the audience. I still think he's incredible though. I'm not about to launch into a homophobic rant because God knows, there is no logical reason to hate or condemn another person for the way they're living their life aside from the fact that you are a self-righteous bigot who needs to seriously consider keeping to your own lane because your lane-switching is annoying everybody. Well, those of us less prejudiced that is.

We've Got Pigs Too

Yesterday, I was taken aback by the lack of concern taken to the traumatic experience that racialicious' Fiqah endured at the hands of an officer. I was not able to watch Carte Blanche last night due to my family's deep obsession with Big Brother Africa 4, but I just read through the transcript and am horrified to say the least. Two unreported rape offenses by police officers here in South Africa . In the same month that a little boy was brutally murdered for no reason at all among others. Police brutality seems only to be escalating and not a single one of these officers despite the brutal and heinous nature of these offenses. Sad state of affairs. One does not know whether the police can be trusted to be called upon for safety. When they commit the same crimes as the men they arrest but are protected by their so called "badge of honour".

I can't help but try and find some relation between these events and the fact that South Africa has such a broken history. Living through apartheid South Africa left many blacks with a strong sense of futility and meaninglessness similar to what Du Bois posited about the problem of the black American underclass. I've seen this most potently displayed by black men of the lower class. I'm afraid to say that they are the demographic most expected to these commit offense both within their communities and beyond. Apartheid has left behind a frightening legacy of cold-spirited black men with a nihilistic killer mentality. Now that these same individuals occupy the police force and are given free roam with the illusion of safety and protection, they've simply taken to abusing their power for their own infantile gains. They feed their egos through the induction of unease. What these imbeciles don't see is that their actions benefit little in the long run. If South Africa gains a reputation for being a crime-rampant nation where police themselves exert the same kind of brutality that offenders do, not only will a massive brain drain begin to occur. Revenue from tourism will most easily be affected. Resulting in declining GDP. These utterly stupid, animalistic idiots are too dumb to see how their impulsive and foolish actions are causing or may lead to the overall decline of this nation's standard. What a useless goverment we have! What significant measures have they put in place?? What are they even doing aside from singing lame tribal songs and complaining about trivial matters.


So, it's true we've got pigs too. Only that ours are not a white male majority.

R.E.S.P.E.C.T. Homie

I don't want to hear about the law of attraction and ideas about "you teach people how to treat you" when it comes to this problem described through a terrible experience of harassment from a male po-po by Fiqah at racialicious

That he got away with this loathsome behaviour is reflective of power privilege afforded in this case to a law enforcer. Just last week we had incidents of police brutality here. So far, I've heard of no serious measures taken against the officers. There is a good chance they'll get of scott-free. How ironic it is that their main victims were a woman and a little child.

As a person I like to believe I radiate self-respect and hold my self in high esteem. In fact, I live by statements such as the one Alanis Morisette made, "I see my body as an instrument rather than an ornament." I carry this notion in the way I walk, dress and behave. This vessel is for doing, it is for action. Not for showing and for passivity. There will always be individuals that disrespect my presence and try to interfere with my existence by trying to get much too personal with me despite my being a complete stranger and showing on interest at that. Or worse still, invading my personal space or staring at me incessantly. These things happen. Even sporting baggy sweats and a T-shirt, it happens. (I always thought this would deflect unwarranted attention)

Must I excuse these imbeciles as just that and go on with my day. No, as always I see these as a reflection of ideas that the men in South African society hold of women. It's clear I live in a highly misogynistic society, a society that favours the idea of women as objects not women as people. It's a fact I've known since primary school when rape statistics were constantly aimed at us from all platforms of media. I remember Charlize Theron even ran an ad campaign about it. "People often ask me what the men are like in South Africa." she states. The answer obviously wasn't good which the commercials sought to expose. There is a definite sickness in this nation when it comes to the way people interact. Racially and most specifically in terms of gender. All South Africans seem to know of each other are the stereotypical notions they learned via talk and TV that ignorance is banal. Whites live in fear of blacks. Local blacks hate foreign blacks. Blacks think whites are racist haters. Coloureds strive to be white and refuse the "black" label that similarly mixed race people in America are never to afraid to adopt. Near-Eastern Asians well...they seem alright but whites and blacks seem to despise their small business sensibility. Don't know much about the Far-Eastern Asians though there's a good chance they may be exposed to the same amount of xenophobia that Nigerians are. It's one enormous racial gash that's been left over for post-apartheid South Africa to endure. With a president singing songs like "Umshini Wami", how is it going to heal.

The same goes for gender. A survey was conducted in June that revealed that 25% of males in S.A. are rapists. That's a remarkable figure. Since the world cup is coming around, these figures are under intense scrutiny. They scare people. Coupled with the AIDS statistics. It's just too much.

It seems that no measures are being taken to educate young men about the dangers of conforming to these false notions of "masculinity". Something needs to be done but nothing is.

It seems the more insecure a man in his knowledge of how "masculine" he is, the more strongly he tries to exert machismo. Studying the majority of individuals that take part in hollering practices. They appear similar in that they are low-income, of African descent and male of course. Social conditioning in most cases teaches men that money and status (as well as the ability to be a "provider") are symbols of manhood. When these are not attained, one is therefore not fully a man. So, masculinity, they perhaps feel must be redeemed in other ways. These are often in relation to women. In making sexual advances, they engage in the act of being masculine; which turns a rejection on the woman's part into an assault on this assumption of manhood.

In my experience, the non-black males that tried to assert themselves to me in this way were defected in ways that were not money or status related but rather in relation to appearance. The popularly accepted notion of masculinity is one of being tall, muscular, strong, broad shoulders, a pronounced jawline etc. Often, when men are aware of their inability to meet these standards is a cause to try and over compensate similar to the description above. I do not believe that a man comfortable in his own skin will need to objectify, attempt to humiliate, harass, grope or disregard physical boundaries. I don't think that anyone with enough intelligence'll treat a fellow human so.

An old but pertinent post in relation to redefining our presently accepted notion of "manhood" at Shakesville puts it all into perspective - how important it is to give young men an alternative form of expression that does not involve misogyny and homophobia.

Some Kind of Nepotism Going On

Wow, wow, wow. After seeing Henry give that ball a little tap, tap, I thought Fifa would order a rematch immediately. But according to Law 5 of the Fifa Rule Book. In every instance, the referee's decision is final after the match has terminated. So...
Sorry Ireland, it seems no matter what sensibility of injustice takes place, the French run tings when it comes to Fifa. Sept and his boys outruled over any morsel of conscience by ensuring that their side get a chance to reclaim their fallen glory.
It's what it has been all about since they won. Conquer and conquer once more. Yet will it be possible to reaffirm why they are the '98 World Champions. Are the French going to bring fire to South Africa next year? Time will tell. But really, Henry should be ASHAMED! What a remorseless creature.

Scapegoating Faith for the Economic Crash

Watching Larry King interview TD Jakes this morning. Whoah now. Why do I get the sense that King is bitter about something. Religion. Aside from saying that Jakes is "selling God" and "preaching prosperity." Religious cynics are usually inclined to point fingers at churches and faith-based organisations as poised to do good in the lives of others but surrepticiously out to enhance their own selves financially. In fact, a writer in Atlantic magazine posited that Christianity in America could possibly have caused the economic downturn here:
http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/200912/rosin-prosperity-gospel

This is such an ambitious thesis. One has to ask, if you are to say that this is the sold reason then that means that the majority population in the US is devout and Christian which I beg to differ. I don't want to allude to stats either because there are plenty even here in South Africa that claim to be Christian or faith-following but barely practice what is expected of that label.

From what I've seen and understood of the crash, is that a sense of greed and want. Constant desire for things driven by the brutal yet subtle coercion of the capitalist regime played a significant role in raising up individual debt on Main Street whilst banks fooled themselves into thinking they could get away with handing out mortgages without proper thought and that this in turn would have no effect on the nation's balance sheet. They wanted their commission because they wanted that vacation to Venezuela in the summer, they wanted that yacht, they wanted that bigger home, that Chrysler, that diamond wristwatch, those designer purses. Greed. Want. Working on the impulse to show others how well they are doing even if it meant they would have to sacrifice their morals, sleep and peace. Look where it's gotten everyone. This should be a lesson not an opportunity to scapegoat.

To that, these so called prosperity messages do not appear to me a way of assuring people of financial wealth as provided by a divine power. It only encourages a less negative approach to take in looking upon a crisis. It avoids fatalism and that doomsday mood that many seen to attain at times such as these to keep people's heads up. One can even say that they are forms of motivational talk rather than a proselytizing of magical provision. It seems to reinforce this notion that religion disconnects one from reality to the point that they forget basic concepts of living such as that which implies hard world and focus, persistence and dedication are likely to bring forth prosperity rather than simply praying and hoping for a better day.

On the "Torture" of Invisibility

This is an excerpt from Toni Morrison's latest offering, A Mercy, which had me standing up and saying "AMEN". I get like that when I come across a moment of commonality between my and the author's expression of a certain issue. It happens often and this is perhaps why reading is one of the most pleasurable things in life. It makes me know that beside the barriers that place us up against one another, there are aspects very very similar about each one of our experiences and this is not revealed more lucidly than through literature. I believe.

"But then Job was a man. Invisibility was intolerable to men. What complaint would a female Job dare to put forth? And if, having done so, and He deigned to remind her of how weak and ignorant she was, where was the news in that? What shocked Job into humility and renewed fidelity was the message a female Job would have known and heard everu minute of her life."

My immediate response to this was:

What those of us observant enough to witness and acknowledge will see is how much alike men and children are. Yet it seems that in an attempt to forge an antithesis to this truth, the myth of the emotionally discordant "babygirl" was forged. That somehow, it is the other way around and therefore it is necessary to monitor and infantilize the ones who held the original power. The keepers of life, the passers-down of the gene. And in spite of all this, complaints are few and far between - the humiliation is this cliche. Yet if the men who want dominion so hungrily were to experience firsthand the treatment women themselves have been accustomed to, what frustration. Each and every time. They throw their toys out of the cot like the infants they truly are and complain about the pain and suffering that we women know too well already.

In all my days of being made invisible by those who for on reason other that to express megalomania and insecurity, I have taught myself steadily to adapt to the weather. Same too of being viewed as a thing of ornamental rather than human worth. Of by default appreciated as ignorant, foolish and uncultured. Of depending wholeheartedly on external validation for my self-worth and them having to deal with some juvenile wrath owed to my dismissiveness (an obvious repurcussion). Of being spoken of in my very own presence as if I were a mere pedigree perched in some corner of the room flapping my tongue. All this to have to endure yet if I choose to make you invisible in my mind's eye, petition against you attempting to "privilege" me by granting me attention or worse yet begin to elevate my status in the heirarchy and strengthen my powers against yours then, then your "entitlement" must act. For it is unacceptable, you believe, that nobody is not to bear witness to you and yours and that a woman achieves higher playing rank. All because you are a man and the world around you has groomed you with the notion that you deserve, you deserve, you deserve. Therefore to be seen not as I have been on more occasions than I can even recall and you could not possibly fathom is quite simply and justly on intolerable hell to you. It is true what Soyinke once said, "Men are just like children. They really cannot bear much pain."

 Note: I may be making harsh generalizations, this is not a sign of hatred - I am just playing observer. That's all. 

Video Phone featuring Lady Gaga

Okay, I am neither excited nor roused into hysterics after seeing this. It's quintessential Beyonce with a brand new weapon - Lady Gaga. It's really nothing new here. In fact, right away it is clear that Hype Williams is the director. We've seen similar products from him namely the "Check on It" video and the "Gold Digger" and "Digital Girl" videos both similar in nature. Now the same oversexed, video vixen image is used this time with leading artist and guest star instead.

I am left disappointed. It's not all that creative. A mere repetition of old styles of choreography and filming. It's getting a tad bit boring. When things become redundant, some of the more observant ones lose interest. After this, highly unimaginative effort, I am starting to lose interest in Lady Gaga, the same way I lost it long ago with repetitive Beyonce and her crew of formulaic design and image team members.

All I'm saying is that for a song so nuanced with such a brilliant instrumental from Shondra "Mr Bangladesh" Crawford, they could have and should have taken this video to the extreme. Blow people's minds. Instead they chose to re-work vintage Beyonce and take on a tired-of-thinking-up-fresh-ideas-like-I-did-in-the-late-nineties Hype Williams to do the same old same old and bore us once more.

Well, on the bright side of things - at least the video is not in black and white!

Beyoncé - New Music - More Music Videos

Pre-viewing Review Of "Precious"

A certain journalist working for the New York Press has come to plenty of people's attention by offering an utterly scathing and critical review about "Precious". Courtesy of the blogs I follow (to the right) that made mention of this review, I got a chance to read what he had to say here: www.nypress.com/article-20554-pride-precious.html

I have not seen the movie. It's not been released in my region but I am interested of course as I have been for several months now. So there is no stance assumable on my part but I will say that it's box office performance so far is severely impressive. This fact alone may be used by sceptics as a way to evince the Western fascination with black suffering. That a movie about African Americans is only capable of doing this well when it involves the harsh realities of life for those slugging through poverty, physical and sexual abuse, teenage pregnancy and illiteracy as the lead character Precious does. I've pointed this out before. It is banal for whites to play leads in most of the movies that get this much attention. But very rarely do we see a woman of colour get the opportunity and if she does then it is in the most negative light possible. I can see how some may take this strand and use it as a way to denomize the movie. That it only seeks to galvanise the popular view of the black woman as the abused, misused person who needs saving (usually from those with lighter skin as it portrayed in "Precious") from a life destined for doom because of these pathological wounds.

I don't want to dwell to hard on this notion. We know movies perform a tremendous deal of damage in the archetypal images they create. So I will say this instead. As an antithesis to White's criticism of Oprah and Perry. Knowing what I know of the horrendous abuse that there two incredible individuals have encountered, I believe their support for this film emanated from a sincere place within themselves that believes stories such as these need to be told. We need to be reminded through film that the world is rife with stories of this nature and to carry on ignoring them is insensitive and somewhat inhumane. That wehave a movie that explores so deeply the psyche of a woman of colour and affords her a voice so raw, truthful and in-your-face means despite the negative aspects of her life that we can see a level of humanity to a people whose dignity and humanness are often ignored by mainstream society. This is not a representation of African American life. Whoever resorts to that thinking simply lacks rationale. But perhaps there are people who are that ignorant. I can't rule that out.

In all honesty, I am always pleased to hear the suppressed voices in society find a platform. No matter how painful there stories may be and how difficult they are to digest, they need to be told and we need to hear them.

50's Imminent Self-Demise Quite Intriguing

Okay, I'm often cynical when it comes to this man. But after hearing the first release off of his brand new album, I'll say I'm starting to recapture the interest I had in him the moment I first heard "In the Club" six years ago. This song is ill - "Baby By Me" featuring Ne-Yo with Kelly Rowland making an acting appearance in the video. I'm liking this jam alot. Catchy lines and a tight beat.

I Did A Relaxer on My Own!

The result was far better than any relax that I've had done at a professional salon. Why? BECAUSE I FOLLOWED THE INSTRUCTIONS! Reading through the dos and don'ts section on the Organic Root Stimulator Pack made me realise why I'd always come home with some burn or other on my scalp after a relax.

1. Not mixing in the activator thoroughly enough makes a faulty mixture likely to scald you

2. Combing the hair while cream is intact

3. Not timing the relax with a timer and just thumbsucking a relax time

4. Placing relaxer on the hairline first - the most sensitive part of everyone's scalp

5. Placing cream directly onto scalp and relaxing previously processed hair instead of new growth only

These are common mistakes yet the major causes of hair loss and breakage. Doing it myself, adhering to all the instructions. I came out without a single burn and relaxed hair.

Easy. So much cheaper. I will not get into the political debate on black hair straightening. I'll leave that to Chris Rock. I do it because it makes life simpler. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Shoot to Kill Someone's Little Baby

A day after the Chief Commissioner Cele of the South African police department, a three year old boy Atlehang Aphane is shot dead. Being mistakenly identified as an offender. All because he stuck a pipe, which was perceived as a gun, through the car window in which he was seated.

Read the full story here: www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/nov/10/south-africa-police-kill-boy

Trigger happy cops not using discretion and logic. Is that really the solution to the crime epidemic in South Africa? Government must seriously reevaluate its approach toward this issue. I hope that this incident among others will spark debate about this so called "shoot to kill" issue. I get the feeling some unthinking officers will use this an a means to vent their suppressed urges to use a gun on assignment and this might very well occur again if intervention does not take place.

The majority of this country's problem lies in government. There is a trickle down of notions encouraging megalomania and using extreme force in the quest for power. If the police do not have the public's best interests at heart and a bevy of sociopathic killers on the loose, what kind of a country can we have that promotes healthy and safe tourism especially as the Fifa World Cup is scheduled for mid 2010. Is South Africa with all its hatred ready to host such a far reaching and important event for the world?

As for idiot Malema who seems to believe his life is under threat and needs the country's taxpayers' money to fund his bodyguards. Who does he think he is, Obama? This is what I mean when I talk about power-hunger. These apparent leaders do not have the people's interests at heart. All they are really bothered about is creating the illusion of power for themselves. After hearing the above accounts, it's clear that the we need more money pumped into our safety than politicians. It's unpleasant to think that simply standing outside of your home tying your laces, taking a drive while off from work or being a little innocent child playing witha pipe in the backseat of a car will get you killed...by the police. History repeats itself doesn't it. Only that the brutality is not white Afrikaaner but Nguni and very much black.

I was reminded of the killing of immigrant, Amadou Dialo who was shot 42 times after attempting to remove the wallet from his pocket whilst the officers believed he was armed and dangerous. More senseless killings.

All For The Love for the L.O.V.E.

 Just checked out the 'This is It' flick and it was amazing. Or would have been amazing. Not much of a sentimentalist but jerked out some tears watching the 'Human Nature' section. The movie just highlighted even more strongly why his death was such a tragedy - this show would've been simply amazing but...
Thoroughly enjoyable. Especially hearing all the quirky rehearsal dialogue. I saw so much more of his conversational personality than I've seen in any of his interviews. He was just a plain old eccentric with plenty of humour. What more would you expect from an artist, I mean a genuine artist such as MJ himself.
A master performer at his peak, his music lives on. Doing it all for the L.O.V.E.